Do you know what word I hate hearing?? Besides the obvious ones like 'moist' and 'bosom' and 'scrotum'...? It is the word INTENSITY. I despise any word that is described as 'intense'. Which is why I am surprising myself as I have just recently joined a Bootcamp class. Today was out first day and we were promised three weekly sessions of hardcore, high energy extreme vomit-inducing INTENSITY. And that is exactly what we got.
5:30am is never a pleasant time to be woken by the shrill wailing of the alarm, that not only wakes you but the whole family also. Its dark and slightly eerie at this time of the morning. Yet up I got, feeling apprehensive yet eager to get the first session underway, so i could remind myself how incredibly unfit, unhealthy and uneverything I have become. I could blame this decline in my health and appearance on the whole falling pregnant and child-rearing thing, but in reality, my weight started creeping on once I discovered the joys of binge drinking. I think before that I was quite thin, maybe even on the slightly underweight side, but something happened. I seemed to skip the whole 'blossoming into a woman thing' and slipped straight into saggy granny mode. (I just love it when people say, "but at least you're tall - you can get away with it") which translates directly to "You're lucky you're tall, cos if you were a couple of feet shorter you would probably not fit into a seat on a plane. In fact you would find it hard fitting onto a plane in the first place).
Anyways, so off I go to my first Bootcamp. Now I must say that after having my first child, I did for about a year get right into this whole fitness thing. I became a dedicated member of the gym, exercised every day and lost quite a bit of weight. And then fell pregnant again. All the fitness I once had stored up had vanished before my eyes. And suddenly I'm about 5 kilos heavier than when i started off. Not good. I had some ear-splitting hard rock playing in the car to 'rev me up' before my first class, yet it only caused a headache. And I hadn't even begun any exercise.
Our first duty was to perform 30 starjumps. This is where it all began to go wrong. I really hope this wont offend anyone, but lets just day that the pelvic floors were working overtime..so much so that I was concentrating so hard on not weeing that I couldn't get my body to coordinate enough to perform the basic task at hand. Starjumps are now another un-favourite word of mine.
Then we did some Indian Running. This is where we form a straight line and jogged up a hill, and the person at the back of the line has to sprint to the front and so on. Except when it was my turn I couldn't catch the front of the line. And when i finally did, the person behind me seemed to nimbly bound past like a gazelle...
We also did a game where we chose a number in multiples of 5 right up to 30, this would be how many reps we did of a certain activity.I chose 25, which didn't seem too bad until I chose my activity. At that stage all i could think was 'Please don't let it be starjumps''...but it was Burpees. Burpees? This sounds like fun I thought...until I saw a demonstration. Lets just say that Burpees are now added to my list of least favourite words.
After some more hideous and downright awful activities, we had made it to 45mins. It was over. The agony..the pain..the sheer bloody hideousness was done. We were sweating more than blind lesbians in a fish market, but you know what?? I realised something. It had been fun. Yes, my heart was beating at an inhuman rate and my mouth was dryer than Ghandi's sandal, but something was causing me to smile. Blame it on the 'good endorphins' or the awesome group of girls who were enduring this with me, or the fact that we had provided free entertainment for the neighbours to watch from the comfort of their loungeroom windwos, but it was definitely....fun. And now I can't wait for our next Bootcamp session. Bring it on!!
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